Before moving on, as we must, to this week's game with Vanderbilt (anger not the god of football lest he take away your mojo), here are a few disparate items on the weekend past.
The wife and I made the trip from Atlanta to Gainesville for the game. I lived in Baja Alabama for most of the 1990's, and even if I hadn't been expecting Auburn to get blown out (which I did), the less time I spend in the state's central Tacky Belt--where redneck north Florida and Yankee south Florida meet, with catastrophic aesthetic results--the happier I generally am.
But hey, it was a fun trip. Our local friends not only had a great parking spot a block from the stadium, they also knew the lunatics who've converted an old Baptist church bus into one of the most impressive tailgate shelters you're ever likely to run across (Florida folks familiar with the University Avenue tailgate scene know exactly which bus I'm talking about). We had a fine time all around.
Also on the Florida front, fans susceptible to superstition on gamedays (I readily confess to be among their number) can but sympathize with the plight of Saurian Sagacity's Mergz, who says of the game, "It Was My Fault." Seriously, read it. One of the funniest non-exaggerated real-life posts I've seen in a very long time.
The morning after the game, I went out in seach of the Sunday paper. When I finally located a copy of the Gainesville Sun (no sarcasm, I'm a big Pat Dooley fan), I was greeted with the following photo on the front page:
That shot triggered a wave of emotion, and I'm not just talking about schadenfreude at the agony of a young man whom every male announcer on ESPN would apparently love to cart off to Massachusetts for a few minutes with a Justice of the Peace, followed by two torrid weeks on Fire Island. No, what I was feeling was... deja vu. Now, where had I seen this before?
And then I remembered:
Finally, no Auburn-Florida recap would be complete without recognizing the foul results of ESPN's "Hire The Senile" outreach program. Ladies and Germs, I give you Cheatin' Lou Holtz's pregame spluttering:
I'd like to be the firtht to congrathulate Thenator Holth on hith electhion. Hail thoo the thief!
I love it, Will!! Every weekend my friends and I look at each other with confused looks over what the hell did Lou Holtz just say??!! I can't understand a word he says. I told someone one time that he had a mild stroke and they believed me!!
ReplyDeleteWhy ESPN keeps him around I will never know. We just turn the TV on mute or change the channel when he goes into one of his long spiels.
Wow, Will, I'm glad I'm not the only person reminded of that... was it the '89 game? I have it on DVD around here somewhere. Slack hit Wasden in the end zone with that 4th-down pass and Auburn held Florida off for a few more frantic plays to win the game. As I remember, we had trailed all night, although we had one TD called back on a questionable penalty. After Saturday's game, my wife and I were telling our 15-year-old daughter about that night in Auburn when Emmitt broke down on the sideline. I actually felt bad for him, he was such a competitor and I don't think any of his Florida teams ever beat Auburn, although that one came very, very close.
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